One Year of Marriage

While we celebrated 10 years of being together this year, today marks 1 year of marriage for us. I imagine most first anniversary posts are filled with magical memories and comments of how the first year being the hardest is a myth, but we both know ours is not the typical first year of marriage. That is not to say that we didn't have our share of magical moments... our honeymoon spent laughing, swimming, drinking, eating and flying through the skies of Kauai, the afternoon spent sitting in the river in Leavenworth wondering if that faint pink line really meant what we hoped it meant, watching you become the unbelievable nurse I knew you'd be, marveling at the miracle growing inside my belly and our hearts, and most importantly, meeting our incredibly strong and beautiful daughter, Evelyn, who blessed us with the titles of mother and father. The first half of our first year together felt too good to be true, and in some ways, I suppose it was.

Unfortunately, what I think will define our first year together is the loss of our child, along with a piece of our hearts. While I would never wish this on any couple, I also know that I would never take back the time that I did get to spend with you and her as a family. Those moments are ones that I will cherish for all of my days, and hold onto tight when the world gets a little too dark. This was not the year we wanted, this was not the year we deserved, and these are not the emotions we imagined feeling while celebrating one year of marriage together.

However, what these experiences have solidified for me is that you are my person. You are not only the love of my life, you are the glue that holds me together when I feel like I am crumbling. You are the sliver of light in a cave filled with darkness. You are the rope I grab hold of when I feel myself slipping. You are my reason to keep going. I can't imagine going through any of this without you by my side, holding me up when I didn't think I could stand any longer. I'm sorry for what this year has brought us, but I am so grateful that I had you through it all.

I know now that whatever life has in store for us, whatever challenges we may face, that we will have each other forever. May our next year present us with less than our first ❤️ I love you, Colin